What If Positive Thinking Does Not Work?


This morning I read an article in The Times stating that positive thinking has a negative side. According to Joanne Wood, Professor of Psychology at the University of Waterloo in Ontario, repeating positive statements seems to work only if it reinforces what the person already believes. “It appears that positive self-statements, despite their widespread endorsement, may backfire for the very people who need them the most,” she says.

Although I do think that positive thinking can work, I am also sure it will not solve all your problems. This ties in well with the Law of Attraction.

Law of Attraction
The Law of Attraction (LOA) states that what you think about most of the time, eventually manifests in your life. Say you are short on money. According to some self help gurus, if you write out a check to yourself for $100,000 and you look at the check enough times, in time you will manifest this exact amount of dollars in your life. That might work. But what if every time you look at the check you think about how poor you are right now, how badly you need the money, how you don’t deserve to own that kind of money, money is the root of all evil, et cetera. That way you reinforce all your old beliefs every time you look at that check. That just might make it worse, because in the end you attract what you think about most of the time.

So how can we handle this problem?

The use of positive affirmations, vision boards and all other things associated with making clear what you want in life have no effect if there are negative or limiting beliefs associated with what you want. If you use EFT on these negative and limiting beliefs you clear the blocks that are in the way of getting to what you want.

You can tap on your own negative or limiting beliefs or you can tap on the positive affirmations. See what works best for you or do a combination of both. If you want more inspiration, I already wrote an article on limiting beliefs concerning Making Money Online and EFT.

More on EFT and LOA
EFT is seen by many experts on LOA to be the missing link to getting what you want using the Law of Attraction. A great book on this subject is Attracting Abundance with EFT by Carol Look (The Tapping Solution). I know I recommended it before, but this book shows just perfectly how you can use the combination of LOA and EFT.

If you like to clear your limiting beliefs by listening and tapping along then Money Beyond Belief by EFT expert Brad Yates (The Tapping Solution) and Joe Vitale (The Secret and The Tapping Solution) might be something for you.

Let me know what you think on the subject of positive thinking, LOA and EFT.


Inspirational Quotes on Positive Thinking

Here are some of my favorite quotes on positive thinking. I’m sure they will inspire and motivate you. Enjoy!

  • “All our dreams can come true if we have the courage to pursue them.” – Walt Disney
  • “A man is but the product of his thoughts what he thinks, he becomes.” – Mahatma Gandhi
  • “A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.”- Winston Churchill
  • “Change your thoughts, and you change your world.” – Norman Vincent Peale
  • “Happiness is an attitude. We either make ourselves miserable, or happy and strong. The amount of work is the same.” – Francesca Reigler
  • “I’ve found that luck is quite predictable. If you want more luck, take more chances. Be more active. Show up more often.” –  Brian Tracy
  • “Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless.” – Mother Theresa
  • “Love life and life will love you back. Love people and they will love you back.” – Arthur Rubinstein
  • “Once you replace negative thoughts with positive ones, you’ll start having positive results” – William Nelson
  • “Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly” – Robert F Kennedy
  • “Our happiness depends on the habit of mind we cultivate. So practice happy thinking every day.
  • “Cultivate the merry heart, develop the happiness habit, and life will become a continual feast.” – Norman Vincent Peale
  • “Reach high, for stars lie hidden in your soul. Dream deep, for every dream precedes the goal.” – Ralph Vaull Starr
  • “Successful people are simply those with success habits.” – Brian Tracy
  • “The best thing to give to your enemy is forgiveness; to an opponent, tolerance; to a friend, your heart; to your child, a good example; to a father, deference; to your mother, conduct that will make her proud of you; to yourself, respect; to all men, charity.” – Benjamin Franklin
  • “The best way to predict the future is to create it.” – Peter F. Drucker
  • “The brain is the organ of longevity.” – George Alban Sacher
  • “The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.” – Eleanor Roosevelt
  • “The person who sends out positive thoughts activates the world around him positively and draws back to himself positive results” – Norman Vincent Peale
  • “There is little difference in people, but that little difference makes a big difference. The little difference is attitude. The big difference is whether it is positive or negative.” – W. Clement Stone
  • “There is nothing so useless as doing efficiently that which should not be done at all.” – Peter F. Drucker
  • “These then are my last words to you. Be not afraid of life. Believe that life is worth living and your belief will help create the fact.” – William James
  • “The soul of conversation is sympathy.” – Thomas Campbell
  • “Winners never quit and quitters never win.” – Anonymous
  • “You can destroy your now by worrying about tomorrow.” – Janis Joplin
  • “You can either take action, or you can hang back and hope for a miracle. Miracles are great, but they are so unpredictable.” – Peter F. Drucker

Please share your favorite inspirational quote on positive thinking in the comments below.


How to Stop Complaining

StopThis one will work wonders for you and the people around you. If you stop complaining, you will notice that you will focus less on the negative and more on the positive side of life. Of course, the people around you will notice this too. By complaining you raise your own stress level. You’re saying “something is wrong” and your body reacts with stress. Complaining is harmful for you and the people around you.

One way to begin on the road to no complaining is described in a great book by Will Bowen: A Complaint Free World. The idea is to put a wristband around your left or right wrist. Now each time you complain or think a negative thought you change the wristband to the other wrist. The goal is to go for 21 full days without changing that wristband.

Learning Phases
On your journey towards 21 days without complaining, you will go through the four typical phases of learning:

  1. Unconscious incompetence
  2. Conscious incompetence
  3. Conscious competence
  4. Unconscious competence

Before you begin you will probably think that you don’t complain that much, so 21 days without complaining should be relatively easy (unconscious incompetence). After a while you’ll find out that you have to change your wristband more often than you thought you would (conscious incompetence). Then you will find out new ways to handle situations and learn how not to complain (conscious competence). And someday you won’t need the wristband anymore, because you’ve trained yourself not to complain anymore (unconscious competence).

A Contest?
Most people will recognize the following situation. You are talking with a group of friends or colleagues and someone starts complaining about the weather or about the heavy traffic. Other people will start trying to top the last complaining (“That is nothing compared to what I went through this morning!”.) Instead of joining in this contest of complaining, sit back and observe. And don’t try to change other people. If you have to do something about the situation, try to steer the conversation to a different subject. There are ways to keep a conversation going without complaining.

Stick to the Facts
All this doesn’t mean that you can’t point out if something is not right. In that case, just stick to the facts. If you just ordered hot soup and it is served cold, you can make that clear to the waiter. But there are several ways to do this. If you complain about it (“How dare you to serve me cold soup?”) you probably made your point, but will it motivate the waiter the do a better job the next time food is served? Probably not. If you stick to the facts (“This soup is cold, could you please warm it up?”), you made your point with respect towards the waiter.

No complaining also means no gossiping. You can still talk about others. But when talking about others, only say something when you can say something positive. And only say something you would also have said (in those exact words) if that person was with you in the room right now.
If you can’t say something nice about someone else, then don’t say anything.

One of the main reasons for gossiping or complaining is to make us look better by comparing us to someone else. That’s bragging and no one likes people who brag. Furthermore, you wouldn’t notice ‘faults’ in others if you didn’t recognize those same points in yourself. An example of this is the people who ordered the purple wristbands mentioned in the book by Will Bowen for people around them, because they felt that those people complained more then they did. To notice something in someone else is the first step to recognizing this in yourself – the first step from unconscious incompetence to conscious incompetence.

Be the Change
You might feel tempted to stop other people from complaining, but that’s no use. You can’t change someone else, only yourself. People change because they want to change. The best way to inspire change is to practise what you preach. Be the change you want to see in the world. You cannot treat others better than you treat yourself.

By complaining you make yourself a victim and victims do not become winners. You’re free to choose what you want to be. By changing your thoughts to gratitude and solutions, you attract more of what you do want. That’s the Law of Attraction in action. You can’t control everything in life and complaining doesn’t change the situation.

If you don’t have a wristband, think of other things you can do to trigger yourself to notice when you are complaining or thinking negative thoughts. Try this out and notice for yourself what impact it has on you and the people around you.

Have fun!


5 Reasons to Start Doing Power Yoga

yogaAbout 4 months ago I wrote a post about my first power yoga experience. Now, I still practise power yoga once a week, although I would like to do this more often. I’d like to share the experiences I’ve had with power yoga during the last few months. These are the benefits I get from doing power yoga:

  • Power yoga gives me more energy. I have more energy after a yoga session, but also in my everyday life: I no longer feel extreme tiredness.
  • Power yoga makes me relax. I can relax better during a yoga session, after a yoga session and also on other moments. Only when I have a lot of stress, I don’t always manage to relax. Maybe I can still improve this by better concentration on my breathing.
  • Power yoga makes me feel better. I feel more love for myself and my body and definitely more positivity!
  • It’s nice that I can see my progress very clearly. I have made progress on doing the poses and on controlling my breathing. Maybe I will leave the beginners lesson soon and start doing advanced lessons.
  • Power yoga is fun! Give yourself the time to work out and to relax, give your body the attention it needs and try new poses!

Have fun with power yoga!


How to Think More Positively and Reduce Stress

When you’re busy, your head is often full of things you need or want to remember. This gives a lot of stress. That’s why I have bought a journal where I can write down everything that comes to mind:

  • To do lists. Write down the things you want to do today, tomorrow or this week. You won’t have to remember every single thing. Just remember to check your to do list!
  • Ideas. Write down any of your ideas: an idea for an article you want to write, an idea for something you’d like to do someday or make a list of all the destinations you want to go to.
  • Names of nice books, shops, restaurants, etc. Write them down so you can buy them or go there if you have the occasion.
  • Gratitude list. If you have a lot of stress, you often focus on the negative things. In my gratitude list I write down all the positive things that have happened: the things I’m thankful of. I write down at least 3 things a day. This gives a good feeling and can be an excellent ending of the day before you go to sleep. Here are some examples of the things that I wrote down:
    • My friends and I had dinner at a nice restaurant.
    • I did volunteer work at a home for people with dementia.
    • I found nice vegan shoes and bought them!
    • I have actively participated at school today.
    • Today’s power yoga lesson gave me lots of energy.
    • The sun was shining today.
    • A colleague gave me a compliment.
    • Gerber and I walked in the snow together.
    • I talked to a friend who I hadn’t seen for months.
    • I did a good job at work and did all the things I had planned to do.
    • I finally cleaned the bathroom.
    • My favorite soccer team won.
    • I received a nice letter from my friend in Portugal.
    • I went to bed early.

Try it, and experience a more positive feeling and less stress. I would very much like to hear your experiences, so please share them in the comments!